leadership dot #4945: don’t wait

My spring allergies caused a cough that interrupted my sleep for weeks. All night long, I had this deep hacking as my sinuses dripped down my throat. I was tired and just did not feel well. I tried over-the-counter meds and went through two bottles of cough syrup before I finally went to the doctor. Within 24 hours of my visit, my energy returned and the coughing stopped, thanks to the serious meds I should have gotten a week earlier.

Why did I wait so long before asking for help?

We do this all the time. Staying after hours to work on a project alone, when our colleagues could have assisted during the day. Taking on responsibilities to plan the entire gathering instead of sharing the load. Struggling to assemble furniture or move it instead of relying on a buddy to assist. Spending time vexing over a problem instead of engaging others to help solve it. Going through trial and error instead of asking someone who knows how to do it.

In many cases, most people are happy to help and rarely are they annoyed by being asked. The problem is in our own heads, equating “asking” as a sign of weakness or lack of self-determination. Rid yourself of that myth and reach out the next time you would benefit from assistance. Don’t say “I’ve got this” when you don’t.

My reward for asking for help!

leadership dot #4944: mothers

The musical Suffs highlights the last seven years of the 70-year struggle of the suffragists in their efforts to allow women to vote. One of the key numbers is Let Mother Vote, a plea to the men in their lives to give women the same rights and access to democracy that they enjoyed. It was a savvy way to help those not directly impacted realize that they had a role to play in the fight.

Today, I think of all the mothers who have made sacrifices — some carrying signs on the picket line, some still protesting today. I think of mothers who are engaged in public service, and those running in the upcoming elections. I think of all the mothers who have worked tirelessly to get out the vote, support candidates, staff the polls, and fulfill many of the less-glamorous roles required by the republic.

Mothers have been making sacrifices for their communities since the beginning. Today, let us appreciate the role women play and have played in helping America flourish and support them in their ongoing quest to provide the benefits of democracy to all.

leadership dot #4943: waitlist

Most restaurant reservation websites are straightforward and generic — you say how many in your party, and you are added to the waitlist.

The First Watch breakfast restaurant added a clever twist to theirs. When you indicate the number of people, it populates an egg crate accordingly. It’s on-brand, distinctive, and fun.

Think about how you can infuse “you” into the small things like your waitlist software. It’s egg-xactly the kind of special touch that can make your customers smile.

leadership dot #4942: skewed

A fast food receipt read: “Rate us a Highly Satisfied and Receive a BOGO Sandwich.” What kind of survey mechanism is this? Instead of soliciting accurate data about how well the restaurant is doing, it will falsely skew the results in a favorable direction, overemphasizing the positive. Any negative feedback has the likelihood of being discounted due to lower numbers.

It’s not just restaurants that rig the system to get good reviews. Some managers create a culture in which only positive comments are welcome. While they don’t dish out a BOGO sandwich, they achieve the same results by delusionally believing that, because they only hear good things, all must be well.

In the book Good to Great, Jim Collins noted that the great companies confronted the brutal facts. They may be hard to hear, but knowing you have problems or performance issues is the first step toward correcting them. Don’t delude yourself by insulating your input from bad news. The ones you want to reward are those who speak the truth, even when it’s hard to hear.

leadership dot #4941: phrase

One of the most useful phrases I know is “help me understand…” It is a sincere way to initiate a conversation when you may not agree with the person or premise before you, or when you want to learn another perspective. Examples:

“Help me understand why you think this is a good idea.”
“Help me understand what you are trying to accomplish with your proposal.”
“Help me understand what the best way is to support you right now.”
“Help me understand how I have upset you.”
“Help me understand what attributes you value in this candidate.”
“Help me understand your preferred learning style so I can onboard you most effectively.”
“Help me understand why you think you missed your goal.”
“Help me understand why you made the decision you did.”
“Help me understand your reaction to the meeting.”
“Help me understand where you would most like to be involved.”

I teach that a key component of a difficult or important conversation is your opening line. It sets the tone for what follows, and the “help me understand” phrasing tends to avoid defensiveness and starts the exchange off on a learning note. Give it a try and see if it can’t jumpstart a productive dialogue for you.

leadership dot #4940: pre-work

I required the students in my negotiation class to interview someone who practiced the skill in their career. Papers ranged from a Union steward to a police negotiator, supply contractor, and real estate agent, but all of them had one central message: preparation is key. The more you are clear on your stand, and the more you learn about the other party’s motivations, the better equipped you are to have a successful outcome.

I think preparation could be the key in most settings. The better prepared I am for a class or workshop, the more learning will take place. The more I plan ahead for an event or vacation, the more memorable the experience becomes. The more prepared I am for simple things like a trip to the grocery store, the more I can maximize my time. And so it goes.

Benjamin Franklin said, “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” Whether in negotiation or most any other activity, he is right. Don’t discount the importance of the pre-work.

leadership dot #4939: cinco

Today is Cinco de Mayo, and if you asked the average person about the day, I’d guess most would get two things wrong. It is not Mexican Independence Day, as many assume, but rather it celebrates the Mexican victory over the French army at the Battle of Puebla in 1862. Secondly, the holiday is a bigger deal in the United States than it is in Mexico. Somehow, marketers of alcohol and avocados have convinced the U.S. public that today is a day to enjoy guacamole and margaritas, which really have nothing to do with the meaning behind the “holiday.”

Keep Cinco de Mayo in mind when your team or family needs an excuse to celebrate. You don’t need to limit yourself to major holidays or even “Hallmark holidays.” There is something every.single.day. that can be used as a theme to create connection and levity. Create your own reason for a toast!

leadership dot #4938: customize

To the unfamiliar, one cowboy hat may look the same as another, but it turns out that these are very personal items. An entire store in Fort Worth, Texas, sells nothing but cowgirl hats and accessories to customize them: many, many accessories, from feathers to pins, bandanas, and leather strips. They even sell playing cards, matchbooks, and buttons so people can add their own touch — all before the hat is assembled and “branded.” Customers were spending a long time (and presumably a lot of money) finding that right combination of enhancements to convey their personality.

Other stores sell hats fully assembled, eliminating the angst over which decorations to choose and making the hats less expensive and ready to wear. For some, that may be the right option. Others obviously enjoyed the curation and quest to design the perfect grouping.

Don’t assume that what you offer has to be fully assembled. Perhaps there is a niche that would like a smorgasbord of your services, allowing them to pick and choose the combination that works best for them, rather than accepting the standard package. Maybe you can add in accouterments that provide a bonus for those willing to invest in a premium offering, or a discount for those who prefer the standard fare. Just like those cowgirl hats, one size does not fit all.

leadership dot #4937: menu

Back in the day, when diners had a simple list of regular dishes, their menus came with pictures of all the offerings. As restaurant variety expanded, the photos were replaced with text descriptions of the many available items. People like me had to resort to scanning other diners’ meals as they were served to gauge what to order.

The First Watch restaurant realized that people are visual and added a QR code to their menus so customers could see pictures of the food before ordering. What a great idea! It helps to align expectations, saves time, and may entice people to try something new. And it saves people from craning their necks or guessing what the next table is eating!

Can you use a QR code as a simple way to provide more detailed information to those who are interested? A picture may be worth a thousand words (or calories!), but a thousand words can also be a feast for the inquisitive. Strive to provide your clients with information in the way they want it.

leadership dot #4936: semiquincentennial

One thing that surprises some visitors to the U.S. is how prolific the American flag is. Not all countries have their flag designs on mass-market merchandise or display their flags in homes and businesses, but if visitors thought the flag was prominent before, they ain’t seen nothin’ yet.

As America approaches its 250th birthday on July 4, marketers have jumped on the occasion to repackage everything they can in red, white, and blue. Cereals, candies, snacks, and beverages all have changed their product colors to capitalize on the holiday. Whole sections of patriotic-themed clothing, soft goods, decorations, and party favors are popping up in stores.

Pay attention, and you’ll find dozens of items trying to gain your dollars. Before you get swept up in the 250th commercial mania, remember what the day is celebrating: our independence from tyranny and the goal of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Spend your money on causes that help promote that, rather than on trinkets and repackaged food.