December 2023 – leadership dots

leadership dot #464a: about me

December 31, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

We all have stories to tell. For me, I tell them through this blog. Others share them via Facebook or Twitter. Still others deliver yarns in person to communicate about their life events. Some people paint their stories.

As I was listening to the Tim McGraw CDs, I realized that he (and most artists) are just setting their stories to music. Each song shares a life event – truth or fiction we do not know, but it relays a vignette about a specific incident to which we can often relate.

Think about your life – how can you reflect on your experiences so that you can share them? Country singer Trace Adkins penned a tune “Songs About Me”, explicitly sharing that he likes country music because it is about “who I am and loving and living, good-hearted women, family, and God.”

These blogs are about me. What vehicle are you going to use to share stories about you and your organization?

Originally published in modified form on September 8, 2013

leadership dot #816a: threshold

December 30, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

Last week, a local news story unexpectedly went viral, so the requests for interviews came in. The best person to speak on the topic was someone who is normally not a spokesperson. While she had the most knowledge of the details, she had little experience in being questioned on the radio; thus, she was understandably nervous.

As she was being prepped for a media interview, her boss stopped in with words of encouragement. “You’re building your threshold,” he said. “The next time you have to do this, your threshold will be higher.”

What great words of advice. People often avoid doing challenging things because they are not experts at them, but it is precisely through doing the difficult work that our threshold increases, and our proficiency in doing the hard task is improved. The skills she learns in doing the media interview will translate into making it easier to have difficult conversations in other venues. The confidence she gains by succeeding at something she did not think she could do well will carry over and buoy her in different settings.

Instead of listening to that inner voice that urges us to avoid the difficult tasks, embrace them as a threshold-building workout. Your strength will amaze you.

Originally published in modified form on August 26, 2014

leadership dot #778a: for granted

December 29, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

Have you ever noticed that we lead much of our lives assuming that things will go right?

People whiz down the highway on a motorcycle without wearing their helmets.

We give a weak goodbye to loved ones, assuming that we’ll see them again next time.

Travelers get on airplanes assuming that they will land and sleep in their rooms without ever checking for the emergency exit.

We know we should have survival kits prepared and rendezvous locations for the family, but most never translate the idea into action.

At work, cross training and preparing a training manual always get pushed to the back burner.

How would we act differently AFTER a negative experience? Would we wear the helmet if we had only known what would happen in an accident? Hug each other when departing? Check those exits and make those disaster plans? Do some training so people aren’t left in the lurch?

I am not advocating that we live life under a cloud and anticipate doom. But insurance is more than buying a policy…can you do a bit more to take a bit less for granted?

Originally published in modified form on July 19, 2014

leadership dot #755a: alphabet actions

December 28, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

Many people work best in stages A to G — as in Gee Whiz! Once the idea is defined, they are ready to move on and let someone else do the implementation. That would be fine, but often that stage involves a lot of grunt work and figuring out the details of how to make something happen. Everyone likes the glory and the excitement that is created when something is new, but not everyone has the talent or temperament to see it to completion.

Then there are others (like me) who derive great satisfaction from finishing. I have a necklace with a charm of a manual typewriter key. I chose the letter “Z” — as in A to Z — to symbolize finishing.

I like the idea of checking something off the list and having it be complete. I like having a strategic plan that is measurable; a target that is met or not, or a project that is thought through enough that it can be delegated to others and become part of the institutional fabric.

A to G is the question mark phase; H to Y is the comma that can go on forever and Z is the period that makes it a sentence. Don’t leave your ideas dangling like a grammar lesson modifier. Push through until the end and earn that Z.

Originally published in modified form on June 26, 2014

leadership dot #779a: time to reconsider

December 27, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

Are those who are anal about time missing out on too much?

I think about the time I “waste” by being early. On-time for me often means arriving first at a meeting and then waiting for the others to arrive. Is there a better use of my time?

I am always at the airport — even ours with its one gate — in plenty of time to do screening and make the flight. What else could I have done besides sit in the boarding area?

A few years ago I piggybacked with my sister and joined her at a conference. She went to a keynote until 5pm and then caught a 6:15 flight. I, on the other hand, was at the airport at 12:30 instead of the beach for a 3pm flight. Am I the crazy one or is she?

Those who are on time are often left waiting for those who are “time challenged”. I wonder who is making the best use of their time.

Originally published in modified form on July 20, 2014

leadership dot #774a: free pass

December 26, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

I have always had staff members who did not want to participate in certain office rituals that we had. They don’t want their birthday celebrated. They would prefer not to attend certain meetings. They don’t want to come to the all-day retreat. They don’t want to join in social gatherings outside of work.

I used to say “too bad” and require people to partake, but I have changed my tune on that as the years have gone on. If the reluctance is coming from a senior leader or someone in a major position, their lack of interest is usually a signal of larger fit issues and I try to address those rather than mandating participation.

But if it is a part-time person or someone in an ancillary role, I no longer force them to attend. Over the years, I have concluded that the negative energy they bring with their reluctance sucks the energy away from those excited about being there and in the end, does more harm than good. I did not always feel that way, but I have come to peace with it and now believe it is best for the group overall.

I recently had this conversation with a colleague who has a new group of reports — and someone who would rather remain on the fringes. The fight isn’t worth it,” I told him. “I know it is counter to all the team building I preach, but it is true.”

Two takeaways for today: 1) Old dogs can learn new tricks. Leadership styles and how they are promulgated can/should/do evolve over time. 2) Think twice before you make something “mandatory.” If someone chooses to pass on something, you may be better off without them than with their negative karma.

Originally published in modified form on July 15, 2014

leadership dot #2383a: refuel

December 25, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

I did a double take when I saw the mail truck at the same gas station I was using – somehow, I never think of mailmen needing to refuel, or at least not doing it at a commercial station. But there he was, putting gas into the tank just like the rest of us.

Use the mail truck as a metaphor for your wellness as we head into the Christmas madness. No one can run on fumes. Make the time to stop and refuel your own energy – whether that be through a few stolen moments alone, ensuring that you get a good night’s sleep, or taking a brisk walk with the dog. Christmas will deliver more joy if we keep our emotional tank full.

Originally published in modified form on December 24, 2018

leadership dot #813a: key ingredient

December 24, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

Our annual employee picnic had always been a potluck. Like most such events, everyone brought far more than they could eat so a lot of food remained at the end. A ridiculous amount of leftovers, actually, so last year we made “assignments” as an attempt to cut down on what people brought. Half the people brought desserts, the other half beverages, and the rest was catered.

As a result, what was left was a copious amount of desserts and beverages. So this year, the event was 100% catered with no potluck dishes at all.

And it became ordinary. There were no special treats that you heard about at work and wanted to try. You didn’t learn about the favorite dish that your co-worker makes. Your beverage choices were punch or water. For dessert: cookies or brownies. It became generic and even institutional.

There is a trade-off between not having to deal with the remaining food and having something become a special event. Just as when people grumble about participating in the talent show at the annual meeting, but later acknowledge that it creates memorable bonding. Pitching in a few bucks isn’t the same as walking in the charity fundraiser either.

Personal investment yields a high ROI in many intangible ways. Easier is not always better.

Originally published in modified form on August 23, 2014

leadership dot#148a: a penny

December 23, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

It’s time for a holiday break from writing dots. Enjoy some repeats until the new year.

I use an exercise where I ask participants to draw (from memory) what is on the front and back side of a penny. It is amazingly hard for most people to do. They don’t remember where the wording is located, which way Lincoln is facing or what image is on the back. (Try it before peeking!)

It is a quick way to capture the attention of people who are attending something that is “mandatory” or on a topic which they believe they are experts (or at least not in need of more training). It illustrates that just because you think you know something, you may not. It also illustrates how easy it is to take something for granted.

Profound lessons don’t need to be lofty. This one is worth far more than its face value!

Originally published in modified form on October 27, 2012

leadership dot #4142: rockin’

December 22, 2023December 21, 2023by leadership dots by dr. beth triplettLeave a comment

In addition to a catchy melody, the “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” song comes with an inspirational back story.

Brenda Lee recorded it in 1958 — when she was only 13. Released as a single, it had a modest reception and became just one of hundreds of Christmas tunes. But the song had staying power and this year topped the Billboard Hot 100, making Lee, at age 78, the oldest person to ever top the chart. (She had a birthday a week later, breaking her own record at age 79.)

If you think of giving up because one of your projects has only lukewarm results, think of Brenda Lee and her Christmas tune. It took 65 years, but her song finally became Number One. Keep putting good work out into the universe without worrying about becoming an instant success. You may rock it decades later.