As I have mentioned before, I read the classified ads for the same dose of humor that I get from the comics. There is always something in the listings that strikes me as funny or odd, but I have also noticed themes in what reoccurs in the announcement section. The number one item that is reported as lost: prescription eyeglasses.

One day last week, there were several pairs lost and even one reported as found. What I can’t understand is why there hasn’t yet been a solution to this problem. Glasses are small, expensive and often taken on/off. Why aren’t they marked in such a way that they can easily be returned?

My dogs have a microchip that is the size of a grain of rice. This would easily fit into the arm of most glasses. People could opt whether or not to do it, and then register their contact information with a central clearinghouse. You find a pair of glasses, you take it in to an optical shop, they scan it and the spectacles are reunited with their grateful owner. If that is too elaborate, a simple identification code could be imprinted in the frame that accomplishes the same thing — sort of a unique serial number that is stored in some database somewhere that links the glasses with their owner.

Transition lenses, progressive lenses, designer frames and more have proliferated the eyeglass experience so much that a pair of glasses is becoming a serious investment. It makes it more worthwhile for people to invest in insurance to have their shades come “home again” like they advertise for pets. 

I hope someone sees clear to take this idea and run with it. If it’s you, let me know: I’ll be your first customer!

dr. beth triplett

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