I had another stint as a citizen advocate when I provided input during the public comment period at the local park board. I am trying to change the regulations that currently prohibit dogs on city trails, so I have made my arguments at city council and now at the park board where it was referred.

During both presentations, the members of the committee sit and smile, nod their heads and appear as if they are in agreement, but when they later deliberate, their actions are opposite of what I wish them to be.

I think about the many situations where people falsely give a positive impression that masks their true feelings. Interviewers are always nice and leave the candidate feeling welcomed, even when there is no way they will be hired. Customer service representatives smile and tend to the clients before them, but later vent with colleagues about the problems presented to them that day. Teachers politely chat with parents during conferences even when their child is a source of continual aggravation.

It reminds me of the dot I wrote last week about how it is easier to hear bad news when it isn’t preceded by good news. Postulated body language falls into that category. While still remaining respectful, try to align your expressions with your true feelings. Be gracious to the person, but remain neutral about your next move. Don’t let your smile say yes when you intend your actions to say no.

How does this dot connect with you? Leave a comment and share your observations with others.









About the Author leadership dots by dr. beth triplett

Dr. beth triplett is the owner of leadership dots, offering coaching, training and consulting for new supervisors. She also shares daily lessons on her leadershipdots blog. Her work is based on the leadership dots philosophy that change happens through the intentional connecting of small steps in the short term to the big picture in the long term.

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