Sometimes I have coaching clients that are seeking assistance in finding their purpose or next career move. They often stress themselves by trying hard to find “the” answer as if a life-defining bullseye will appear in the ether.
Instead of lamenting about the end goal, I encourage people to think about steps along the way. First, consider the “uncommon measures” that bring you joy and satisfaction. Rather than trying to ascertain what the big purpose is, become aware and pay attention to the little markers that give you some of what you are seeking. Write them down and then step back and try to see what themes they reveal. Love it when you’re able to see change? — maybe that is a clue. Get a dopamine hit when you are helping someone? — take note. Get jazzed up when you’re complimented on your problem-solving abilities? — another hint as to what you should incorporate into your life.
Second, think about how you’d like to define your role. Not your job or tasks, but what role do you want to play? I get satisfaction when I’m a connector — able to connect people with ideas or concepts that help them understand. I know someone who relished playing the role of “shit-disturber” and embraced his function of questioning assumptions and disabusing excuses. What role gives you satisfaction and how can you incorporate more of it into your daily routines?
I also advocate learning by doing. I think volunteering is a smorgasbord of opportunities where you can try things out and see what brings you joy and test how your role fits you. You can volunteer for almost any task and in multiple settings — see what resonates and then find ways to do more of it. Volunteering is low risk and can be a very high reward in a multitude of ways.
Finally, take some time for deep reflection, not just passing thoughts while in the shower or on your commute, but try to craft a block of time where you devote mental energy to thinking about your purpose in life. You may start by writing down “How I Found My Career” (dot #3908) and seeing what clues the past provides about your future.
Whether you are just graduating from college or nearing retirement, having intentionality about how you spend your days is a meaningful pursuit. Don’t let others dictate how you live your life.
